Needed Emotions

It's been a long time since I felt this way about anybody
It is so refreshing to find you in my path
You may not care, and at this point I don't need you to be
I find attractive, I find you really good-looking
I love your entire feature, from the twinkle of your eyes
The characteristics of your jaw line
The definition of your stature, that keeps me locked on you
Hearing you speak is a softly played tune on the radio
A fresh cup of lemonade on a summer day
When it's all hot and sticky being next to you, gives me hope
that maybe it's not over for me yet

Afraid of Rejection

It's so nerve wracking to start something new. People have these expections of you, of what you should and how it needs to be done. I always want to push the envelope. I don't like the rush of it, but at the same time I like being able to do something new and to do it well. I love the feeling that I get when I know that I've done it well. I'm so afraid of putting myself out there. But at the same time I feel that I need to put myself out there. I don't know. I know that I'm doing right, but I want that affirmation that it I am doing it right. Even though deep down inside I know that I am doing it right. Maybe that's selfish.

Your name is my password

There is a reason why Your name is my password. There are places I need to get to and I need a password. It's interesting to see how far I go without it, to only realize that I haven't gotten too far. I'm turning 20, still ain't got a man. I'm drowning in debt, debt that I can't afford to pay, school is becoming more than I can handle, the things I want to do are becoming dreams. Your Word is becoming less of a reality to me and more of a fantasy. It hurts and breaks my heart to even admit. The sad truth is tomorrow I'll go back into the real world, and it has its fist ready to go. Its fingers ready to molest and harrass me. Its all groovy ain't it? I need a Word from you. There's a reason Your name is password in life, it's so that I don't have to deal with this issue. I've been so secure, because you kept me secure. How much more independent do I need to be. I'm supposed to help, but I'm taking control. My views overlooked majority of the time, until I create a sound heard around the world. If I have creative control, then give the control, if I need to be in control all the time then give me control all of the time. But I'm no doll. YOu're supposed to guide me, You're my portion, my friend at all times, You're my Father. IF Your Word speaks true, the Word that made itself flesh to die for me, then either 1) my prayers aren't heard, 2) my prayers are heard and it's taking a while for the answer to get to me, or 3) You're just not real. But I know that #3 is a plain lie so that is immediately eliminated. Lord, I don't want to be in debt. I'm not even 20 yet, and I got so many things coming at me, so many things that I'm hindered to do, and I don't even have any responsibilities. This is the time that I'm supposed to be young and free right? So here's the deal, I'm joining the sorority, I'm taking the driving lessons, I'm taking that TaeKwonDo class, I'm going to stay in school, I will buy my books and still do what I got to do with church. How I will find the time? I don't know. But the best part is that I don't have to worry about that. You said you would provide my needs. You haven't failed me yet, so I put my trust in You. You have to help me with my grades, You HAVE to help me with finding time, You HAVE to help me get my driver's license, YOU HAVE to help me. Why? Because you promised me YOU would. That's why YOUR NAME, JESUS, is my password.